Affliction of the Mind

There is this thing that has been plaguing me since I was just a new born. It hovers over me, always there, threatening to take over. Because of it I have to watch what I touch and what touches me. I live my life by its rules. As a kid I could never own many soft toys because it would use them to get to me. Simple everyday items like fruit and soap were weapons of its choice. It would cover my legs and arms, sometimes even reaching to my neck and back. What was this horrible affliction? Eczema.

Now in all honesty, my eczema isn't that bad compared to some. I can control it by diet and surroundings most of the time. I also have prescriptions of creams that attack it before it can attack me. Yet for a lot of my childhood, I felt horrible about it. I hated it. No one likes to wear shorts when they have scaly legs and t-shirts show of the red sores that cover the inner elbow. It would, on some days, make me feel ugly and like a monster. Here I am, nearly 17 years of life, and there are times that these simple scratchy little marks still get to me. But who am I to complain?

I mean that seriously. Not only am I typing this on my own laptop, but in my own bed, under a blanket or two. I am also in my own room with my personal phone next to me. There is a roof over my head and food and water about 20 metres from me. I have a network of friends, some of which I could talk to about pretty much anything, and a strong immediate family. Not once have I lacked any basic right of life. I can write about this affliction that causes me to miss out on some of the simple things of life, living with more than half the world could probably imagine owning.

I have started to realise recently that not only are there people who cant control their 'affliction' but that there are people who don't know there is any other way of living. There are people who have severe mental illnesses that cause them to live without joy, there are people who are bed ridden with a physical sickness and there are those who don't have a bed or even a floor. There are blinds, deafs, mutes and paraplegics. To them, what would a little bit of eczema be?

I've had this thing with me since birth. I probably use it everyday, not intentionally, it just happens. It controls the way I think and sometimes even how I talk. It's grip is on my mind and perception. As a kid I didn't even realise it controlled me, but it always has. Because of it, my life has different rules. Its an affliction I carry on my mind. What is it? Its indifference.

I take things for granted way to easily, always have. I cant treat this affliction with a prescription or any tablet known even on the black market. It is one I have to treat by opening my eyes to the people around me, learning their stories and what its like to be them. Eczema may always afflict my diet and what I can touch... But indifference can be beaten. I can appreciate what I have and help those who don't have as much. This is my life, my chance to live. This is also their world, and their place to live. I can at least try to make it better.

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